books and words.

it is often easier to hide behind all of these words,
these pages,
these ideas,
then to face the world that is out there
just  beyond my window
just beyond my reach.
believing to be all to real
much to painful
much to something other then what I want it to be

so I use my books
my words
to shield myself from harms ways

I cloud the issue with to many cigarettes
I muddle the issue with to much coffee
being much to careful as to who I let in
who I will let understand
who will understand,
or even believe all of it to be true
trying not to walk away from it all
and live to write another day.